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Keep it Together!

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Keep it Together!

“The ability to control my emotions and my actions, regardless of circumstance, sets me apart from other men.” – Navy SEAL Creed

I would add …and women, but the point remains, controlling your emotions is the key to being a good warrior and a good salesperson.   If you think you are good at it, you might be, but we could all be better.

Controlling your emotions when selling IS the binding factor to all other lessons and skills you’ve learned. In other words; it’s very important, and below are some skills which will help.

There is a common term used in sales which is “Show Up and Throw Up.”   This is a term used to describe a salesperson who exemplifies the antithesis of meaningful, purpose driven sales.

Some examples are:

  • Knowing what to say and then not saying it
  • Falling back onto binary responses (Binary response is your core when you take away all you have learned about selling.)
  • Stuttering or stammering
  • Straying from a benefit sales approach, and talking about features or how the product is made.
  • One word responses (yes, no, sure etc.)
  • Darting eyes
  • Deer in the headlight look
  • Sweat
  • Actually throwing up

Controlling emotions It’s not as easy as it sounds, and it does not sound easy.


First: improve your binary.

  • No matter how many times you have pitched the same product, or how many people you have been in front of, you will find times in which you falter.
  • By working on your process in your head, mentally reviewing your last encounter and improving your process on an ongoing basis, when you do falter, you will be falling back on to more solid ground.

Anything you are selling, whether at retail or wholesale, you should be able to pitch it at the drop of a hat, and that pitch should be constantly honed.

I recently visited a manufacturer and they were training me on their product. I asked what I thought was a simple, basic question; “who buys your product?” The manufacturer literally had no good answer. At the drop of a hat, you should have a well-rehearsed answer to common questions.

Second: detach.

  • Remember that you did not make this product, you represent it and sell it. If you in fact made or designed it, let it slide.
  • Don’t take any negative criticism, or even a lack of interest as a personal assault.
  • Remember that it’s unlikely that the person in front of you will make or break you.
  • You don’t have to be perfect to make the sale.


Third: remember that your potential customer is a person too.

  • As stupid as that sounds, it’s important to remember that it’s simply another person standing there.
  • Be sincere, we all have good and bad days, we all face hardships in life – so use this to relate to your buyers.
  • Understanding the buyers personality, and relating to them as a person is the fastest way to calm emotions, and the best way to start your relationship.
  • Treat them like you know them. This means be a bit more familiar with them, act like you know them a little more than you actually do.


Fourth: understand yourself better.

Many large corporations have very specific and scientific ways of interviewing prospective salespeople. They want to know if you are in control of your sales process, and there is a well know way to determine this.

Job interviews are stressful, and because it’s about you, the risk of speaking from an emotional frame of mind is high.

“Why should I hire you?” That’s it, that’s all. Your answer to this determines how in control you are of emotions.

The metric for this is how much you say, and how much you talk about irrelevant topics unrelated to the question.

  • Make sure you understand where you are emotionally, and what triggers an emotional interaction.

Fifth: breathe.

  • Studies have shown that it’s possible to listen to someone while breathing.
  • Studies have also shown that breathing is a critical element of you making it through your presentation alive.
  • If you find yourself in the weeds… focus on your breathing while listening.


Lastly: remember it ain’t easy.

  • Understand and accept that it’s not easy.
  • People like to believe that they are ruled by logic and are rational. You are going to know what role emotion is playing, so you can better control it.
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